What No One Tells You About the Rise After the Fall
We have a WhatsApp Group Chat for Book Dommes, and Deb, one of the Dommes, sent us all this poem the other day. She said it reminded her of the work we do together.
The poem struck home for me too, not just in a "wow, that’s beautiful" kind of way, but in a been there, lived that, still living it kind of way. I’d say it captures what Self-Reclamation *actually* looks like (in all its messy glory).
So I want to share it with you. Because sometimes, someone else’s words can reflect your own story back to you—with clarity and precision. Here it is:
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Poem by Stephanie Bennett-Henry
Beautiful girl, when you are finished falling, after you hit rock bottom and watch yourself come apart into a million pieces, no one is staying to help you collect yourself. No one is sticking around to pick through your pieces to decide which parts of you are worth keeping. That’s for you to decide.
So stay down for as long as you need to.
This is the most important part. Take your time. Pay attention. You already broke. So the easy part is over. Go slow...
I know, you thought the breaking was the most painful chapter. It wasn’t. Turn the page.
The next part is much longer.
It’s the healing. The rise. The comeback. It’s the birth of the new you. And it’s not easy. But you are strong and brave and worth it.
You’ll have to leave a lot of yourself behind, you’ll have to let go of all the parts of you that you’ve outgrown. We’re not making ourselves small anymore. We’re not bending to fit where we don’t belong anymore.
Do you hear me? We’re going all in.
Count your wounds, every scar ripped open, every drop of blood you bled like a promise, every tear you cried like a bet in the name of crossing your whole heart, your whole soul, was all for this moment.
Right here. Right now.
You had to hurt like that to get here to this version of you who knows exactly who she is, who she’s not, who she will never be again.
Drop the apologies, babe.
We’re not sorry anymore for who we are, we’re not sorry for what we had to do to get here, and we’re not sorry for the time it took to learn our worth. Step out of the box of all you were supposed to be, according to everyone who wasn’t you, and walk into the you, who’s comfortable in her own skin.
It’s time. You earned it.
We no longer wear the expectations of anyone else and we no longer let anyone else decide what we’re worth. Because we know now. We finally know. And now it’s time to celebrate it.
Get up, babe. It does not hurt anymore.
Now go show YOU what you’re made of.
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I read this and thought—I’ve walked that road. I’m still walking it. And I know some of you are too.
For me, Self-Reclamation isn’t a concept or a trend or a theory.
It’s not even about "awakening" in some abstract, collective-consciousness-shifting sort of way. It’s about *real life*.
It’s my marriage, how I relate to my kids, how I care for my body, emotions, and desires.
How we run our household. How I sleep at night.
It’s that steady peeling away of all the layers of who I thought I had to be and learning to live from who I actually am.
And doing that alongside other women who are also shedding layers, healing, rising, and figuring it out as they go.
What Slow & Wild, and Book Dommes in particular, definitely ISN’T about?
Performing some idea of feminine energy… or becoming a perfect partner or mother or woman. Nope.
It’s about getting real.
✔️ Learning skills that help you feel safe in your body and in your relationships.
✔️ Building actual trust, starting with trusting yourself.
✔️ Bringing fire and polarity back. Creating deep respect.
✔️ Feeling free and seen and secure.
✔️ Being able to handle what life throws at you without losing yourself.
If you want to be in this kind of container—to explore these kinds of shifts with other women who get it—you should come hang with us.
Book Dommes is not just a book club.
It’s a study syndicate and sisterhood all wrapped into one.
Here’s how 2 of our Dommes describe their experience:
“What has surprised me the most is how this space has given me permission to be messy. This has never come easily to me, and it’s made it hard to communicate as openly and confidently as I'd like to. I’m still working through resistance, but being surrounded by women who meet each other exactly where we are has felt really nourishing and supportive. I feel seen and celebrated every time I speak up and share. I’m learning to soften and show up even when it’s uncomfortable, and that’s been huge. The most valuable part for me is having a sisterhood nearby—a community that feels reliable, real, and close to home.
If you’re hesitant or self-conscious like I was, I’d say come as you are. You don’t have to perform or have it all together. Just showing up makes a difference—not only for you, but for the other women who are inspired by your presence more than you probably realize.”
– Gigi
“Book Dommes is the space I’ve been looking for my whole life—since puberty or before. A female-centric, sex-positive, shame-lifting community where no topic is off-limits and no part of you has to be hidden. Since joining, I’ve realized something profound: I’m fine just the way I am. I’m learning, I’m growing, and I always will be. There’s nothing to fix—only deeper layers to uncover and embrace.
The most valuable part for me is the women. Their stories, honesty, reflections and feedback. The way we witness and support each other, and how safe I feel.
If you’re on the fence about joining, here’s what I’d tell you: No one else is going to take the reins for you. No one else will give you permission to live fully and authentically. That’s yours to claim. And this is the space to do it.”
– Katie
And if you’re ready to move all this reclamation wisdom through your body in a playful way, to let it land in your bones, jiggle out through your booty, and blast that cork out of your ass... 🍑🍾
Join us for the next Choreo Series.
Limited spots available. Claim yours here (👈 click on the SERIES tab at the top of the schedule).
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One last thing:
I’ll be traveling again next week for a new training—which means no classes on Tuesday, March 25th or Thursday, March 27th. Just a heads up so you can plan accordingly.
As for the training... let’s just say it’s the next evolution of my journey, and it’s going to shape everything I bring to Slow & Wild from here forward.
I’m stepping into a 6-month advanced practitioner immersion that goes deeper into the somatic, psychological, and relational layers of transformation.
Think power, polarity, and profound emotional release.
It’s for women who want to work with couples to awaken erotic vitality, and who want to be masterful in the realms of intimacy, healing, and the body.
I won’t say too much more right now—but I will say this: It’s already shifting me, and the work we’ll be doing together is about to go even deeper. Whether it’s in Book Dommes, Choreo, coaching, or the upcoming Dirty Vanilla Parties—this is where we’re headed.
Get ready.
💋 Kris (aka Venus)
